John, woke up after the annual office Christmas party with a pounding headache, cotton-mouthed and utterly1 unable to recall the events of the preceding evening.
After a trip to the bathroom, he made his way downstairs, where his wife put some coffee in front of him.
Louise, he moaned, tell me what happened last night. Was it as bad as I think?
Even worse, she said, her voice oozing2 scorn. You made a complete ass3 of yourself. You succeeded in antagonising the entire board of directors and you insulted the president of the company, right to his face.
He's an asshole, John said. Piss on him.
You did, came the reply. And he fired you.
Well, screw him! said John.
I did. You're back at work on Monday.
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